Conversations with my kid: Evolution

Lucy: Mommy, where did the first animal come from?

Me: [Shit, is it okay to Google and drive?] Um, evolution.

Lucy: (blank stare)

Me: Okay, so millions and billions and trillions of years ago, living things were just tiny micro-organisms. And they changed and grew and changed and grew over all those years and now there are animals and people.

Lucy: I have a scratch on my nose.

Today’s science lesson was made possible by the State of Arizona public education system and the support of viewers like you.

The Dropoff

Some mornings Lulu loves getting dropped off at daycare.  She runs inside and is perfectly at ease.  Other mornings, not so much.  Sometimes she is shy, sometimes sad, sometimes tired, happy, crazy… I never know what I am going to get with this girl.

She was happy this morning.  She sat down at a table to finish eating her Cheerios.  I hung her sweatshirt up, gave her a kiss, and asked her to be a good girl at school today, to which she replied, in her commanding little voice:

“Mmhm.  And you be a good girl at work today.”  – Lulu, age 3

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Can I Have A Take Back? I’d Really Like to Take That Back

During a discussion on university liability with regard to student mental health in class today, the question of pre-screening freshmen for mental disorders came up. I disagreed with the idea (for many reasons) but stated that if we screen for mental disorders, we will have to screen for everything.

Keeping the discussion going, my teacher said, “But it’s been shown that suicide has a high incidence rate in college students.”

My rebuttal?

“So does herpes.”

Caroline in Grad School… for the win.

Gift Giving {Three Year Old Style}

I was out of town for my  birthday this weekend.  When I got home last night, Lulu was excited beyond belief.  She told me all about the cupcakes they picked up, and then ran into the living room for a moment.  When she came back, she was holding a little blue present.  She squealed in delight…

“Do you want to open your present??  It’s shiny earrings!”  – Lulu, age 3

I adore her.

Um… what?

The first words out of Lulu’s mouth this morning were:
“Hey momma…?”
“Yes Lulu?”
“I’m not going to say bad words at preschool today.  I won’t hit anyone either.”
Oh…well that’s good, I suppose.  What on earth goes on in her head???
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Food Baby

This morning, as I was getting her dressed, Lulu asked, “Is there a baby in your belly?”

I’m pretty sure I quit breathing for a minute before I managed to sputter out, “Lord no!”

Before I had time to question why she was asking this, she replied, “Me neither.  It’s just food.”  And she proudly pushed out her belly for me to see.  It took a lot of control not to crack up.

“Mine too, baby.  Mine too.”